The Uncomfortable Truth About Money and Marriage
Money doesn't care about your feelings, but your marriage does.
Love might make the world go round, but money makes marriages either stronger or more fragile. Here's what nobody tells you at engagement parties: the couple who can talk honestly about finances before marriage has a better shot at happiness than the couple who thinks love conquers all financial disagreements. Colorado couples are waking up to this reality, and they're doing something their parents rarely did—they're having the money conversation before the wedding bells ring.
Why Colorado Couples Are Having Different Conversations About Prenups Than Their Parents Did
Your parents probably got married when houses cost less than your car, when one income could support a family, and when debt meant a mortgage and maybe a car payment. Today's Colorado couples are dealing with student loans that rival mortgage payments, dual careers that might require relocating, inherited family businesses, and the reality that second marriages are common. The conversation has shifted from "prenups are for rich people" to "prenups are for people who want to be intentional about their financial future together."
What Makes Colorado Prenups Different
Colorado isn't just another state when it comes to prenuptial agreements. While some states treat prenups like wild-west contracts where anything goes, Colorado has created a more structured approach that protects both parties while still allowing flexibility. The state follows the Uniform Premarital Agreement Act, but with some Colorado-specific twists that make these agreements both more predictable and more fair.
Here's what sets Colorado apart:
Both parties must have separate attorneys or explicitly waive this right in writing
Full financial disclosure is mandatory, not just "good faith" disclosure
Courts can modify spousal support provisions if they become unconscionable
The agreement must be signed voluntarily without coercion
Certain provisions about children are automatically void
How Colorado's Approach Differs From Other States
Some states will let you sign a prenup the night before your wedding after a few drinks at your bachelor party. Colorado won't. The state requires that both parties have adequate time to review the agreement and consult with counsel. While Nevada might enforce a prenup that leaves one spouse with nothing, Colorado courts will step in if the terms become unconscionable over time. This isn't about making prenups harder to create—it's about making them more likely to hold up when they matter most.
The Uniform Premarital Agreement Act in Colorado
Colorado adopted the Uniform Premarital Agreement Act, which provides a framework for what prenups can and can't do. Think of it as the rules of the game—everyone knows what's allowed, what's forbidden, and what happens when someone tries to break the rules. The Act covers everything from property division to debt allocation, but it draws hard lines around child support and custody. You can't sign away your future children's rights to financial support, no matter how much you both agree to it before they exist.
The Bottom Line: Colorado prenups operate under clearer, more protective rules than many other states. This means more predictability for couples and better protection for both parties, but it also means you need to follow the process correctly to create an enforceable agreement.
The Real Reasons People Get Prenups (Beyond Protecting Assets)
Prenups aren't just about hiding money from your future spouse—they're about having honest conversations before you need to have them.
Most people think prenups are for billionaires worried about gold diggers. The reality is much more ordinary and practical. Modern couples use prenups to address the financial complexities that come with real life: student loans, career changes, family businesses, and the messy reality of blended families. These aren't conversations about not trusting each other—they're conversations about being clear with each other.
Here's what's really driving Colorado couples to consider prenups:
Student debt clarity: When one partner has $150,000 in law school debt and the other has none, a prenup can specify who's responsible for what
Career flexibility: Protecting the spouse who puts their career on hold for children or supports the other's business dreams
Family business protection: Keeping a multi-generational family business in the family while protecting both spouses
Inheritance planning: Ensuring family heirlooms, property, or investments pass to intended heirs
Blended family security: Protecting assets meant for children from previous relationships while building new shared wealth
Setting Financial Expectations Early
The most valuable thing about getting a prenup isn't the document itself—it's the conversation you have to create it. When you sit down to discuss who pays for what, how you'll handle debt, and what happens if one person wants to start a business or go back to school, you're forced to be honest about money in ways most couples never are. You discover whether your partner thinks "our money" means everything gets pooled immediately or if they believe in maintaining some financial independence. These conversations happen eventually in every marriage. The question is whether you want to have them during calm, rational moments or during heated arguments about the credit card bill.
Remember: A prenup isn't a lack of trust—it's a roadmap for handling money together, created when you're both thinking clearly and feeling generous toward each other.
Common Prenup Myths That Need to Die
Half the resistance to prenups comes from outdated ideas that were never true in the first place.
"Prenups are only for rich people" - False. If you have student loans, a car, a retirement account, or any debt, you have enough financial complexity to benefit from clarity
"Getting a prenup means you're planning to divorce" - False. Getting car insurance doesn't mean you're planning to crash, and getting a prenup doesn't mean you're planning to split up
"You can include anything in a prenup" - False. You can't waive child support, include illegal provisions, or create terms that violate public policy
"Prenups aren't romantic" - False. Nothing says "I love you" like having difficult conversations when you're both calm and committed to each other's wellbeing
The Truth About Who Really Needs Prenups
The stereotype of prenups protecting trust fund babies from scheming partners is mostly Hollywood nonsense. Real prenups protect teachers with pension plans, small business owners with debt, and middle-class families with modest savings. They protect the nurse who worked through college debt-free from their partner's medical school loans. They protect the graphic designer who inherited their grandmother's house from having to sell it to split assets. They protect two divorced parents who want to blend their families without blending their children's inheritance. The "rich people only" myth keeps ordinary couples from having conversations that could strengthen their marriages and protect their futures.
What You Can (and Can't) Include in a Colorado Prenup
A prenup isn't a magical document that lets you make up your own rules about marriage. Colorado law sets clear boundaries about what you can and can't include. Think of it like building a house—you can choose the floor plan, paint colors, and furniture, but you still have to follow building codes. The good news is that within these boundaries, you have plenty of room to create an agreement that works for your specific situation.
Here's what you can include:
Property division rules: How assets acquired before and during marriage will be divided
Debt responsibility: Who pays what debts, including student loans and credit card balances
Spousal support terms: Whether alimony will be paid, how much, and for how long
Business interests: How a family business or professional practice will be handled
Inheritance protection: Keeping certain assets separate for children or family members
Financial management: How you'll handle joint accounts, investments, and major purchases during marriage
What's Off-Limits in Colorado Prenups
Colorado draws hard lines around certain topics, and no amount of clever legal language will change that. You cannot include provisions about child support or custody—these decisions always belong to the court because they involve the rights of people who don't exist yet and can't consent to your agreement. You can't include anything illegal, like agreeing to commit tax fraud or hide assets. You can't create terms that are so unfair they shock the conscience—Colorado courts will throw out unconscionable agreements. And you can't include personal behavior clauses like "no weight gain" or "must have dinner ready by 6 PM." Courts won't enforce lifestyle requirements, and frankly, if you need a contract to get your partner to treat you well, you might want to reconsider the whole marriage thing.
The Prenup Process in Colorado
Getting a prenup isn't like ordering takeout—you can't decide you want one on Tuesday and have it ready by Friday. Colorado requires a methodical approach that protects both parties and creates an enforceable agreement. The process takes time, requires full disclosure, and involves multiple steps that can't be rushed or skipped. Think of it like getting a mortgage: there's paperwork, waiting periods, and legal requirements that exist to protect everyone involved.
Here's the typical timeline:
Initial consultation: 1-2 weeks to meet with attorneys and discuss goals
Financial disclosure: 2-4 weeks to gather and exchange all financial documents
Negotiation and drafting: 3-6 weeks to create and refine the agreement
Review and signing: 1-2 weeks for final review and execution
Total time: 2-4 months from start to finish
Why Both Parties Need Separate Attorneys
Each person needs their own legal advocate, not a shared one.
One attorney cannot ethically represent both parties' interests
Independent counsel ensures each person understands their rights
Separate representation makes the agreement harder to challenge later
Courts look more favorably on agreements where both parties had legal counsel
Different attorneys can spot potential problems the other might miss
Required Disclosures and Documentation
Complete list of assets, including bank accounts, investments, real estate, and personal property
Full disclosure of debts, including student loans, credit cards, and business obligations
Income information from all sources, including employment, business interests, and investments
Tax returns for the past three years
Information about any pending legal matters or potential inheritances
Documentation of any gifts or transfers between the parties
Making Sure It's Enforceable
The best prenup in the world is worthless if a court won't enforce it. Colorado courts will scrutinize prenups for signs of coercion, fraud, or unconscionable terms. The agreement must be signed voluntarily by both parties with full knowledge of what they're agreeing to. Both parties must have had adequate time to review the document and consult with counsel. The financial disclosures must be complete and accurate. And the terms must be fair enough that they don't shock the conscience of the court. This isn't about creating a perfect document—it's about creating a document that will hold up when it matters most.
Remember: A prenup signed under pressure or without proper legal representation is likely to be challenged successfully in court, making the whole process pointless.
Red Flags That Could Invalidate Your Prenup
Courts aren't impressed by legal documents that were created through shortcuts, pressure, or dishonesty. A prenup that gets thrown out is worse than no prenup at all because it gives you a false sense of security while providing zero actual protection. Colorado judges have seen every trick in the book, and they know the difference between a carefully crafted agreement and a document that was rushed, coerced, or built on lies.
Common mistakes that doom prenups:
The last-minute surprise: Springing a prenup on your partner two weeks before the wedding
The financial hide-and-seek: Failing to disclose assets, debts, or income sources
The take-it-or-leave-it approach: Refusing to negotiate or allow adequate review time
The DIY disaster: Using online templates without proper legal review
The unconscionable terms: Creating agreements that leave one party with nothing
The missing paperwork: Failing to properly execute or witness the document
The pressure play: Using emotional manipulation or ultimatums to force signing
A prenup created through coercion, deception, or procedural shortcuts isn't worth the paper it's printed on—and Colorado courts will prove it when you need protection most.
The Money Talk: Costs and Investment
Let's talk about what a prenup actually costs, because pretending money doesn't matter when discussing financial protection is like pretending calories don't count when you're trying to lose weight. A properly done prenup in Colorado typically costs between $2,500 and $7,500 total for both parties, depending on complexity. Yes, that's real money. But compare that to the average cost of a Colorado divorce—around $15,000 to $30,000 per person—and suddenly the prenup starts looking like a bargain.
What affects the cost:
Complexity of assets: Simple finances cost less than multiple businesses, properties, or investment accounts
Level of negotiation: Agreements reached quickly cost less than lengthy back-and-forth discussions
Attorney experience: More experienced lawyers typically charge higher rates but often work more efficiently
Geographic location: Denver and Boulder attorneys typically cost more than smaller Colorado towns
Hidden costs: Financial disclosure preparation and document review time
Rush jobs: Last-minute prenups always cost more due to expedited timelines
Why the Cheapest Option Isn't Always Best
You can find attorneys who will draft a prenup for $500, just like you can find surgeons who will operate in their garage for cheap. The question is whether you want to trust something important to the lowest bidder. Cut-rate prenups often use generic templates that don't address your specific situation, skip required procedures, or contain unenforceable language. When you're protecting assets worth tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars, spending an extra $2,000 to get it done right isn't excessive—it's insurance. The most expensive prenup is the one that gets thrown out in court because it was drafted poorly.
Remember: A prenup is insurance for your financial future—you want coverage that actually works when you need it, not the cheapest policy you can find.
When You Should Skip the Prenup
Prenups aren't magic solutions for every couple, and sometimes they create more problems than they solve. If you're both 22 years old with no assets, no debt, and no family money, spending $5,000 on a prenup might be overkill. If one partner is fundamentally opposed to the idea and sees it as a relationship dealbreaker, forcing the issue could damage your marriage before it starts. Sometimes the cost-benefit analysis just doesn't work out in favor of a prenup.
Skip the prenup if:
You both have minimal assets and similar debt levels
Neither party has family wealth, inheritance, or business interests
You're both starting careers with similar earning potential
The cost of a prenup exceeds the value of what you're trying to protect
One partner views it as a fundamental breach of trust
You're getting married within 30 days and don't have time to do it properly
Alternative Options to Consider
Even if a full prenup doesn't make sense for your situation, you still have options for protecting certain assets or clarifying financial expectations. These alternatives can provide some protection without the complexity and cost of a traditional prenuptial agreement.
Consider these alternatives:
Postnuptial agreements: Create an agreement after marriage when circumstances change
Separate property designations: Keep certain assets separate through careful documentation
Estate planning tools: Use wills, trusts, and beneficiary designations to protect inheritance
Business operating agreements: Protect business interests through corporate structure
Life insurance: Provide financial security for both parties and children
Financial planning conversations: Have detailed money talks without legal documentation
Pro tip: Even if you skip the prenup, having the financial conversations that would go into creating one can strengthen your marriage and prevent future money conflicts.
Making It Work for Your Relationship
The conversation about prenups can either strengthen your relationship or create a rift that never fully heals. The difference usually comes down to how you approach the topic and frame the discussion. This isn't about protecting yourself from your partner—it's about creating clarity and security for both of you. The couples who handle this well use it as an opportunity to get aligned on money before marriage. The couples who handle it poorly turn it into a test of love and trust.
How to Bring Up the Topic with Your Partner
Start with your motivations, not your demands. Instead of "We need a prenup," try "I've been thinking about how we want to handle finances as a married couple, and I'd love to talk through some scenarios with you." Frame it as planning for your shared future, not protecting against your partner. Bring it up during a calm moment when you both have time to talk, not during wedding planning stress or after watching a movie about messy divorces. Be prepared to listen to their concerns and answer questions honestly. If they need time to think about it, give them that time. This conversation sets the tone for how you'll handle difficult topics throughout your marriage.
Working Through Emotional Resistance
If your partner's first reaction is hurt or anger, that's normal and understandable. Nobody likes feeling like their future spouse is already planning for failure. Listen to their concerns without getting defensive. Ask what specifically worries them about the process. Sometimes the resistance isn't about the prenup itself but about feeling blindsided or pressured. Work together to address their concerns rather than dismissing them. If they're worried about fairness, involve them in creating terms that feel equitable to both of you. If they're concerned about cost, discuss your budget and explore options that work financially. The goal isn't to win the argument—it's to find a solution that makes both of you feel secure and respected.
The couples who use prenup discussions to strengthen their relationship are the ones who approach it as a team project rather than opposing sides in a negotiation.
The Bottom Line: A prenup conversation handled with care and respect can deepen your relationship and improve your financial communication. A prenup conversation handled poorly can create lasting damage that no legal document can fix.
Ready to Have the Conversation?
Most law firms treat prenups like any other contract—cold, clinical, and focused only on the legal technicalities. We believe prenups are as much about relationships as they are about law. The couples who work with us don't just get a legally sound document; they get a process that strengthens their communication and builds confidence in their financial future together. We've seen too many couples struggle with prenup conversations that turned adversarial when they should have been collaborative.
How The Reputation Law Group Approaches Prenups Differently
We start every prenup conversation by understanding what you're really trying to accomplish. Are you protecting a family business? Managing student debt? Planning for a blended family? Once we understand your goals, we help you have the right conversations with your partner before we draft a single word. We explain Colorado law in plain English, walk you through the process timeline, and make sure both parties understand their rights and options. Our approach focuses on creating agreements that protect both parties fairly rather than maximizing advantage for one side.
Why Colorado Couples Choose Our Team
Colorado couples trust us because we combine legal expertise with relationship wisdom. Our attorneys have handled everything from simple asset protection to complex multi-generational family wealth planning. We understand Colorado law inside and out, but we also understand that every couple's situation is unique. We take time to listen, explain options clearly, and create documents that reflect your specific needs and values.
Next steps for couples considering a prenup:
Schedule a consultation to discuss your specific situation and goals
Consider having both partners attend the initial meeting to ask questions and understand the process
Plan your timeline allowing 2-4 months for proper completion
Gather financial documents early to streamline the disclosure process
Communicate openly with your partner throughout the entire process
The best prenups protect both parties fairly while strengthening the relationship that created them—and that's exactly what we help Colorado couples achieve.
